<body>           // SMILE. <body> <body>

18:56.
" Wednesday, 30 May 2007

Ahahahahahaha XD

I'm EUPHORIC, mannn!!! It's like, the first time I'm going back to S'pore for my mid-term break, which is only like, 3 days. WOW. HAPPIEEE!!! Hahaha, I'm also going to see Rain in concert! *squeee* He's the Korean dude. I'm sure SOME of you guys will know who he is... Asia's Justin Timberlake! Only problem: my mother bought tickets to see him too -.-". Luckily I've got seats away from them, so yeah :) YAY!!! Perfect holiday, this one... YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!!! Okay. I probably won't post again until Tuesday or Monday, 'coz that's when I get back. So, yeah. I CAN'T WAIT TO GO!!!

COUNTDOWN: 8 hours, 55 mins, 23 seconds ['til I board the plane outta Perth]


15:15.
" Monday, 28 May 2007

“Without a set of rules in a society, there would be chaos. Rules usually exist to create and maintain a sense of order. However, rules must work, or they are useless.”

Is that why we have cliques?

Think about it. I mean, limiting ourselves to cliques is all because of some unspoken ‘girl rule’. We have to mix with our own ‘class’. If you’re popular, and you like Maths, you can’t hang with the nerds. Rule No. 1: Choose the winning side. Everyone seems to think that the cheerleaders and airheads are just going to wipe out the rest of the less-fortunate school community. It’s like Davy Jones’ ship {the aforementioned ‘leaders and bimbos} against a toy sailboat {the minority}. Davy Jones is gonna win, right? And EVERYBODY wants to win. It basically comes down to the food chain. If I’m not mistaken, it goes something like this:

Cheerleaders->Airheads->Suck-ups->Sluts->Dancers->Drama Queens->Musicians->Singers->Asians->Nerds
->Emos->Dykes->Lowlifes

Yup. There are like, a TON of subcategories, but going into them would just make my head ache. ARGH! The world is so unjust!!! WHY DO CLIQUES EXIST?! God, I feel like leading a Bastille-like charge against this stupid hierarchy… but I’d most likely be put to death.

Oh well. One can only dream…


11:15.
"

Study. The worst period of Day 1. It's unbearably mundane, and equally useless. It is NOT going to benefit me in any way at all. Why? Well, I've left my earphones in the boarding house. Now there's nothing for me to do in Study except blog. I'm deprived of the simple pleasure of listening to The All-American Rejects. *Sigh*

Okay. Haha, first I have to apologise for the blatant emo-ness of my last two posts :) I was actually very high on donuts, so yeah. I have VERY adverse reactions to glazed donuts. Very adverse. Kay. Well, I have nothing to say. I am bored. Everyone seems to be working on something or rather in this period. I mean, Kay Lyn is working on her short story, which might be due tomorrow, which means mine is due tomorrow too, and I have close to a 1000 words to write. Some people are labouring over their Science projects, or revising, since the test is on Wednesday. What am I doing? I'm BLOGGING. Seriously, it's like I have no sense of priority! Productivity certainly has no part in my life. Nup, no part whatsoever.

I feel like a failure. Ha. How ironic. Wait... what exactly is irony? -.-" Great, I'm using expressions that even I can't understand. I'm lame.

Ok, I'll just stop before my posts get emo-er XD

*************************************************************************


08:25.
"

Go away.

Leave me alone.

I want NOTHING to do with you, understand?! NOTHING!!!

Stop tormenting me, love... take your ethereal vision elsewhere

Please, I'm begging you...

I can't live like this, not with everything around me reminiscent of our time together

This can't go on.

You have to GO. Don't call, don't write, just GO!!!!!!

Because if I ever find any trace of you in my life again...

I will go mad.

Stop this folly, stop it I say!

WHY DO YOU PERSIST IN MOCKING ME? DO YOU ENJOY TORMENTING ME?

please.....please just go......

I need to stop thinking, please, leave me....

LEAVE! WHAT PART OF THE WORD 'LEAVE' DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND?

It's over. I'm done.

From this moment on, so are you.

Bye.

See you in Hell.

.....

God, CAN'T YOU JUST TAKE THE BLOODY HINT AND LEAVE?!

Stop. Coming. BACK!

It's bad enough that I see you everywhere I turn, everytime I hear a voice

Everytime I hear a song, everytime I hear laughter

YOU EVIL, TORTUROUS BITCH.

Go FRICKIN' away!

Stop. Stop. Go bloody away before I'm forced to hurt you.

I will. I'll hurt, just to avenge the agony I went through.

So you'd better go before it's too late.

1...

2......

3.........

Oh, did I mention that it was a 5 second countdown?

4............

5.

BOOM.

I'm decided. I won't return your calls.

I won't write back to you.

Your name will no longer exist.

I'm going to BURN it out.

How?

By finding another like you.

Another one that will smile, wink, then stab me in the back.

Maybe I like this twisted love.

It's always better when I bleed.

Because everytime I burn them out of my head

I'll have you.

Strange, isn't it?

How I only want your memory, not the person

Because memories can't hurt

They are innocent.

But you...

You.

Are.

NOT

*************************************************************************


06:57.
"

Did we create a modern myth?
Did we imagine half of it,
Would happen in a thought from now

Save yourself, save yourself
The secret is out

To buy the truth, and sell a lie
The last mistake before you die
So don't forget to breathe tonight, tonight's the last so say good-bye

The secret is out
Goodbye

*************************************************************************

Did we create a modern myth, did we imagine half of it...

God, I wish that it had been just a fantasy

If it had truly been a dream, then why can't I escape?

Why must this childish desire strangle me, render me useless?

Help me. Oh god, help me... Why can't I get over you? I WANT THIS TO BE FALSE. I WANT TO FORGET, TO LIVE WITHOUT THIS SELF-PITY. Please, please... If I cannot see you, cannot be with you, then die. Vanish into thin air. Drive me mad, so mad that I only see you. Oh, that would be perfection at it's purest! Drive me mad............

or drive me to my grave.


21:46.
" Sunday, 27 May 2007

Don't you remember how I swore to serve you forever? Or have you already erased all your thoughts about me? Am I nothing more than a hologram, a fake truth, a lost memory? Something damned to be forgotton? A worthless cobweb in the dust- infested halls of your mind? The very notion makes me nauseous. But you don't care, do you? No one's ever cared. Everyone I love always turns on me. They may fall over themselves in a bid for forgiveness, they may remain nonchalant, but I now when they've betrayed me.

Will you be one of those people? My cold, corrupted, fallen angels. I doubt it. Why?

Because you were PURE. I was the one to turn you into what you are now. I was your corrupter, your rival, the only person that truly needed you. Oh, you're a smart one. You would have known of my intentions all along, I'm sure. But still, you distance yourself from me, feigning ignorance and disdain. You can tell all the lies you want, but that night... the single night... gave me the truth, no matter how unwelcome it may seem to you. I was ever so happy that night. Happy without a cause, some people have said. But I was ECSTATIC. Because my suspicions were confirmed, my hope bolstered. The future was bright for us, if only we chose to take it. Only now do I realise that such a vision was temporary, a mere mockery of what could be. Because the day you left, you just waltzed away and left me stranded in the cold. Afraid. Hurt. Alone. And utterly despising you.

To be only yours, that was my fondest wish. Much to my despair, it still is. If wishes were meant to come true, then I must be cursed. My wishes never fulfill themselves. But I need this to work. Oh, I need this to work. You are my only hope, my link to reality, my anchor to sanity. I need you, don't you see? Without you I'll go mad. Wonderfully, beautifully mad. And when I take my life, you'll be there to witness it. To witness me sheathing a dagger into my beating heart for all eternity. Then with my last breath, I will claim your life. Swift and sure... the Romeo and Juliet of the 21st century

But one can only dream...


18:52.
" Friday, 25 May 2007

Hello everybody!!!

I know I'm like, two days late, but whatever. Well, I hope I was missed while on camp, 'cos I know I missed you guys. Even though I hardly see like, any of you AT ALL, especially my SCGS people, I REALLY REALLY MISSED YOU! I guess that when you're stranded in the middle of nowhere, without flushing toilets and other modern amenities, your mind just jumps right to the things you've left behind in the name of 'Outdoor Education'. Which brings me back to you peeps, inevitably. Oh, right, this is probably the part where I lapse into a detailed description of exactly how 'interesting' camp was. Well, I won't disappoint! I know you duckies are just SO eager to hear about my exploits!

H'okay! Starting with Day 1:

Well, the whole camp thing didn't get off to a particularly good start, seeing as how I had to get up like, super-early 'coz the bus was leaving at 7.30 a.m -.-" Didn't have much breakfast, and got called up to redo my room TWICE. Yeah, to cut a possibly-long-drabble short, the morning sucked. The bus ride took 4 hours, it was too noisy for me to take a nap, and the toilets at the halfway stop stank to high heaven. Arrived at camp thoroughly knackered, grumpy, and already hating it. I had the horrible feeling that I wasn't gonna be paired with like, ANY of my friends, so I contented myself with sulking near a carton of mandarins. Yah, the people in my camp group were kinda 'iffy', like, there was Prue, Flora, Bronte, Bonnie, Megan, Laura, Jerri-Lee, Amy, Atteya, Tobiana, Phoebe, Anisah, Amelia and Georgia. Yeah. Half of them were pretty okay, I guess, but I never mingled with them much... and I actually really disliked a few. And I was tent partners with Megan. DIAO. I guess she's not that bad, but like, not good also. Confusing, I know, but that's school politics for you! My cooking group was a bit munted (Aussie slang, and it means 'screwed up'), I guess. Like, I know me and Georgia were kinda like misfits, since we had literally no friends but each other (we didn't even know each other that well either!) in that camp thingy, and Anisah & her friends were a bit ... yeah. I was like, super pissed, because unlike the other camp groups, we had to take the bus to this 'HAUNTED' hut in the bush, and hike back the next morning. Yep, that was the dampener of the day. So, got to the hut, heard about how much the drop toilet stank, so just pissed in the bushes :P No, it's not that gross, I still had toilet paper, man! We had to sleep all cramped up in the hut, and I was like, so close to the potbelly stove that the zip on my sleeping bag melted... so... argh. Anyway, cooking was really shit. The spaghetti ragu was kinda nice, but Anisah and Georgia were on the verge of a massive catfight, all because 'Nisa reckoned that Georgia wasn't cutting the onions properly. I was like "Wtf, man.... it's just a load of ONIONS!" Thank goodness I was there to be the mediator... the way Georgia was gripping the knife... I was so scared that she was going to slit Nisa's throat! I mean, one can only be so tolerate of airheads, right? Kays. Well, I like couldn't sleep, Jerri-Lee kept kicking me in the face, and people kept waking me up... what a way to start off camp!

Day 2:

Wah, had to get up bright and early today for the hike back to base camp... 12km!!! The backpack was very light, but I was still half-asleep when we set off, and we had to go abseiling (where one climbs down a cliff face only attached to a light harness) right after, so I was pretty jittery! The track we were on was quite straight, so didn't get too tired until we reached the foothills, which were more like goddamn MOUNTAINS. I swear I was walking on a 75° angle half the time. I was having a meaningful conversation with Ms Falkner for like, the whole thing. It was quite the stupid thing to do, I admit. Then Prue and Flora came up with this retarded hiking-thingy that goes something like "I dunno what I've been told, but people are 'somethingsomethingsomething'. And the chorus is just SO cringe-worthy "Speed! Up! Move those bums!" I'm like, "Oh. My. God. SomeonegetmeoutofherebeforeIgosoinsaneitwon'tbefrickin'funny!!!" Yeah. We had to listen to them sing that little ditty over and OVER again, and they were like, so kiasu... kept pushing me and the rest of the gang to go faster 'coz they were scared they were going to msis abseiling. Haizzz, I was ready to like, just stop right in my tracks, 'coz I really can't be fucked if they miss the bloody thingymajiggy or not, okays? So.. yeah. Finally got to the base camp and had lunch. Which was this icky thing called Flatbrot. 'Tis actually wholegrain bread, but it looked like a cow pat, a.k.a cow poo. Disgusting. And it tasted like sprouts :'( K, after lunch, had to like, take the stupid bus again to abseiling, and I was like damn nervous lah! I mean, I'm pretty sure that I have vertigo (fear of heights), and I have MAJOR trust issues, so I'm (in all actuality) dead meat. Ms Falkner was trying to make me feel better about the whole thing by telling me about her own height issues. Dumb old coot. Just made me more.. eurgh. So yeah. Got to the cliff, and I was having a major panic attack. To make things worse, my ankle just decides to go bust, and while I was trembling and fumbling over the edge of the drop, my leg was bloody killing me! Michelle was being so incredibly patient with me, and I went over. YAY! Haha, felt so good after doing it, though I slipped big time on a few parts. After the whole thing was over, time to head back to camp. Ha, was actually looking forward to dinner this time, 'coz it was satay chicken. Even though it was the watered-down ang moh version, still quite nice, you know? And Anisah was much better that night. Yah, had a very nice sleep in the cosy lil' tent as well...



Day 3:



Was supposed to have Aboriginal Culture today, but the person running it (Mitch) was sick, so went caving instead. That was seriously scary. I think I've also developed claustrophobia, and the cave was called Golgotha, which apparently means 'The Skull'. Yeah, it didn't help anything when we were told the name. It was PITCH-BLACK in there, and the floor was slippery with all the limestone n' stuff, and my torch was SO weak. So yeah. Was like, terrified. I was right at the back, with only Michelle behind me, so my fumbling around in the dark wasn't holding anybody up. She was like "I know you're claustrophobic, so you don't have to go in to the crawly bit", which is like this bit where you get on your hands and knees and inch forward into irrepressible darkness with the sand chafing your knees and the rubble underneath you makes your crawl even slower and the blackness is just SMOTHERING. I did it, though, which is how I know about all those icky feelings you get. But I was sorely tempted to just give up right there and then. Anyway, we reached the very bottom and there was sand. And it didn't smell all limestoney! So all of us sat in a squircle, even Chris (the cave guide), and we had this 5 minutes of silence thing. Everyone turned off the lights and kept quiet. Except for me, of course. Hehehe, I couldn't resist, man... While everyone's faces were scrunched up in concentration I did a hand-fart. Like, with my hands, duh. And they started sniggering, then they all cracked up. I was seriously laughing so hard. Chris got pissy at us though, and had this whole 'respect for the camp leaders blah blah blah' lecture that kinda took the fun out of the whole experience. Damn. Anyway, we then had to climb back out of the goddamn thing, which was something I was NOT relishing, 'coz those that were at the back (me), had to now lead the group back. And you know me... always going at a snail's pace... So yah. I was 'leading', then Amelia cut in front of me because my torch wasn't bright enough for me to see the texture of the ground, and I didn't mind, but then Nisah cut in front, then Bonnie did, then Bronte. I mean, what happened to ME leading, huh? Doesn't anybody have the value of patience anymore? Geez! Kays, whatever. What mattered was that I got out of the cave alive. ALIVE!!! We were like, sprinting up the steps out of the hole, everyone was so glad to be out of there! And then on the way down to the bus, while running, which was a stupid idea, my other ankle just twisted. I was like. ARGH! It's like my ankles have a permanent thing that makes them go 'flop' everytime I do something involved with camp. Bad luck, I presume. Haiz. Then after the caving we had to immediately head to the river for our canoeing. The bus ride was 1 hour man! So long!!! Yeah. I was singing Stefanie Sun's 'Wo Ye Hen Xiang Ta' and Ariel Lin's 'Fei Ni Mo Shu' on the ride to myself. Pathetique, right? Okay. Then we had to pick up the canoeing instructor guy, who had actually ran 5 km from the canoe campsite to the launch point. And Ms Falkner, when the dude got on the bus like "Hello gorgeous!". We were all puking up by that time, and I swear Bonnie was green in the face. There was just this horrible silence after she said it, and the dude (Cory was his name) looked at us all and said "Well, if I had known we had mute kids to take care off I mighta learnt some hand signals!" No one found that even remotely funny. We just glared at him until he withered. Fun, eh? Okay. So we got to the canoe base and we had to walk 500m to the main point and setting up camp in the bushes. It was quite a sad affair, really, and we had to watch Flora dig the trench toilet. Michelle said that it was because we could 'poo in a row', and everyone just lost it. I mean, in the right context, it's amusing. Hahaha. K. Maybe not. So me and Megan set up the tent in a cosy little corner, and yeah. Dinner was interesting, 'coz we found out that Cory was a Kiwi (New Zealander), and them Aussies love taking the piss outta Kiwis. So we were all making rude jokes that involved sheep, and it was the BEST riverside campout ever. Okay. This 3rd day post is taking up too much space. Cut short.

Day 4:

Got up so early today to go canoeing, and it was raining. That really sucked. Ok. Anyway, we had to lug the bloody canoes down to the launch point, and the ground was steep and muddy, and yeah. I was stumbling around like a drunk in Cory's wetboots and yeah. Bad start. Then I got paired with Ms Falkner, which mighta been a blessing in disguise, since she'd canoed before, and was kinda interesting to talk to. We crashed a total of 17 times. Yup. But not serious ones, at least, not until we hit the rapids. We kept getting beached on the rocks smackdab in the middle of the bloody river. Very stupid. But we had a very animated discussion about me. Why I kept adapting personas to suit the social situation, my family, life in S'pore compared to Perth n' stuff like that. Not the most meaningful talk, but it was reasonable enough to divert my attention from the dismal state of our manoevering skills :) Well, not really that much to say about today, except that the whole experience was rather interesting. We got back to the base camp quite early, and the original plan was to go to the beach and have dinner there, but we were so tuckered out we couldn't be bothered. Dinner was a pretty quick thing, and we had a very nice pudding dessert. Yummm. Okay, this is starting to get boring...

Day 5:

Haha, last full day of camp, man!!! Yeah, everyone was so bloody cheerful. We had Aboriginal Culture at 9-ish in the morning, and it was super fun!!! We got to throw spears and boomerangs, but mine never came back... Diao... but yeah. It was pretty good. Then we were split into groups, and I was in this dude called Mason's group, and he was built like Shrek! Haha, what a way to be mean... But he was! It was quite amusing, and he carried this axe and like, a dagger around. We were seriously pissing ourselves!. Then Mitch said that we had to make Aboriginal weapons, but we had to collect, wait for it, wait for it..... KANGAROO POO!!! Yeah. Roo shit. Disgusting, right? Hmph. Most of the people, including Prue, got REALLY into it, and she had a pocketful of the dried kanga shit. Gross, man! Yeah. My main goal was to make a walking stick, like the one Mitch had, but my glue paste didn't work out well, and the stick wasn't a good one, so I walked away from the thing with nothing. Hmmm, what did I have after the culture thing? OH. The dreaded HIGH ROPES COURSE. I was really really scared of that one. It's like, this course that we have to walk on, like, really thin ropes, 20m above the bloody ground, strung up between trees, attached to an abseiling harness. It was SERIOUSLY SCARY. Which is why I didn't do it! Haha, so smart. I couldn't even complete the little tutorial they had. Sad work, man...

Okay. Too lazy to write anymore about camp. That was the last activity anyway. K. So now I'm at my cousin's house on the com, listening to N*Sync. Haha, see the depths to which I have sunk to? Yeah. It's almost depressing. Oh, hope you like the new look. It might look a bit skewed in Safari, for those Apple users, but whatever. I kinda like it!

Okay, I'm done here. Peace out, dude :P

Toodle-pip!


14:03.
" Saturday, 19 May 2007

Hello again, lovies. I'm just stagnating in my room here, waiting for my laundry to dry, so I'll just re-do an old meme of mine :)

1. What's your biggest fear?
Pain

2. What makes you happy?
Feeling loved for who I am

3. You like...?
Feeling secure

4. Your favorite shampoo?
Schwarzkopf Professional Bonacure Hairtherapy: Colour-Save {wah, long name...}

5. Your favorite body soap?
Body Shop Neroli Jasmine

6. You wish your eyes were...?
Green, emerald green

7. Are you a clean freak?
When the mood strikes, yes

8. Do you cuss a lot?
-.-" That questions answers its fucking self, thank you very much!

9. What does your hair look like?
The nest of a crow suffering from Irritable Bowel Syndrome

10. Do you burn CDs a lot?
Only ever tried it once or twice

11. What's your favorite, night or day?
Night. That's when me and Angie connect, and when my friends call

12. What's your favorite time of day?
Midnight, 'coz if you're still awake, you get this triumphant feeling, like "OMG, I stayed up late! I feel COOL!" ... wadeva

13. What's your favorite time of night?
10-11pm. If I'm lucky, good things happen

14. Been in love before?
Yes.

15. Do you miss anyone right now?
Yes. Very, very much.

16. What annoys you?
My inability to articulately express my disdain for bimbotic members of the school community

17. What's your favorite song?
Fairytale Gone Bad- Sunrise Avenue

18. What's your favorite line from a song?
"Look in my eyes, you're killing me, killing me.. All I wanted was you..."

19. What's your favorite quote?
"Don't hate me 'coz I'm beautiful, hate me 'coz your boyfriend thinks so too"

20. What's your favorite movie?
Stick It

21. What's your favorite quote from a movie?
"M: Fuck you, Potter! P: No, fuck YOU, Malfoy! M: Fine, where? P: Right here, right now. M: A little open, don't you think? P: Hell yeah!"

22. What's your favorite brand of clothing?
BSG

23. What's your favorite brand of shoes?
Hmm... again, my obsession with wedges continues...

24. Do you paint your fingernails?
Yup

25. What's a shitty movie you've seen lately?
Pledge This

27. Coke or Pepsi?
Coke

28. Love or lust?
Once again, neutral. But I'm leaning toward lust ;)

29. Widescreen or Fullscreen?
Depends what you're watching *hint hint*

30. Do you get scared easily?
Sometimes

31. Do you have any siblings?
One younger brother

32. Are your mom and dad still together?
Mmhmm

33. Bath or shower?
Shower

34. Your favorite color?
Amethyst

35. Which actress do you think is beautiful?
Keira Knightley

36. Which actor do you think is hot?
Randy Harrison off QAF

37. Do you like candles?
No. Afraid of them setting the place on fire

RANDOM THINGS

1. Perfect gift?
Your heart {metaphorically speaking}

2. Favorite saying?
You go do what you have to do for whatever reason you have to do it. I just want you to know that I'll be here when you get back.

3. What kinda car do you drive?
I want to drive a BMW

4. What color is your car?
I'd like it to be the colour of gun metal

5. Where do you work?
School. As taxing & as mind-numbingly boring as real work

6. How old are you?
FIgure out for yourself, poufter

7. Do you have any animals?
1 dog, 1 rabbit & 1 chinchilla. The fish aren't worth my time

8. One word to describe you?
Quirky

9. How tall are you?
Around 1.65m

10. Do you have a cell phone?
Doesn't everybody have one these days...

11. Watch alot of TV?
Maybe

12. Who is your best friend?
Not telling, it wouldn't be fair on all my other friends

13. Who do you miss right now?
Her. Her, and only her.

14. Are you bored?
Yes, which is exactly why I'm doing this

15. Do you daydream a lot?
No, but I dream while asleep, wonder if that counts

16. Can you swim?
Throw me in the baby pool and I'd drown. That an answer?

17. What's your middle name?
Don't have one

18. Who was the last person to call you?
Mum

19. What's your favorite smell in the whole world?
The shampoo in her hair

20. How many pillows do you sleep with?
One

21. Are you shy?
If I'm drunk and stoned, then no

22. Do you regret anything?
Anything and everything

23. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Not when those 'first sights' last for less than a minute

24. What's your religion?
Freethinker= nothing

25. Are you happy?
I'm content, not happy

26. What's your name?
Eugenia

27. Birthday?
8th of February

FINISH THIS...

1. You had me from...
... the start. How 'Gone-with-the-wind-ish'!

I'll...
... kick your ass, you little ************

I miss...
... you so badly

Your touch...
... means more to me than your money

Smell...
... the greenhouse gases, people! Go Global Warming, whoohoo!

You're very...
... beautiful. VERY , very , beautiful.

---------------------------------------------

Okay, this is going to be my last post for a week, since I'm going on CAMP. Ugh... Yeah, I'll be spending a week in caves getting pooped on by the friendly bats of Margaret River. I'm just so excited! -.-" Yeah, I hate camping out. Oh well, it's only a week, and I'll write all about it when I get back. Til then...

MUACKS!!!


09:47.
"

She's so big hearted, but not so remarkable
Just an ordinary humble girl
Expecting nothing as we're made to think
It's a pretty person's world

But you are beautiful and you better go show it
So go look again, you gotta be true to your own
If you really wanna go to the top,
Do you really wanna win?
Don't believe in living normal just to satisfy demand

Well if you wanna get free,
And if you wanna do the passionate thing
And if you wanna get smart for the sake of your heart and all
You should own your name and stand up tall
And get real, and see the beauty in ugly

Well you are fresh, your face is fabulous
Don't forget you're one of a kind
When nobody's checking the deeds you've done
And nobody's hearing your cries
You make all of the fashion statements
Just by dressing up your mind

Well if you wanna get free,
And if you wanna do the passionate thing
And if you wanna get smart for the sake of your heart and all
You should own your name and stand up tall
And get real, and see the beauty in ugly
And see the beauty in ugly


******************************************************

See the beauty in ugly, by Jason Mraz. Ok, maybe this isn't the best way to express the situation, since you guys far from ugly, Maddi & Georgia, but yeah. It's coming a bit late, I know, but I thought that I'd do a rerun of 'Too Little Too Late', like last year. Sorry if it, ya know, bugs you or somethin'. Basically, you're big-hearted, humble, and lovely lovely people. Don't let those bimbos get to you ok? They might have fabulous faces (hardly!), fashion-orientated (hardly!), and well, yeah, and arrogant... But if they want to get free, make a name for themselves, smarten up, then they'll have to look to you. Because you two are the best. They need to get real if they think that they're so perfect, and above you. So don't worry about it, ok? I know you're probably over this already, but I had to have my say. You probably won't read this until like, next month, but that's okay. I got the point across.

Remember, you two are always perfect. To your friends, at least. :)


21:32.
" Friday, 18 May 2007

Friends forever. Amis pour toujours. If only life were that simple. How many people have put their trust in me.. only to have me spout their deepest secrets to some malovent 3rd party? How many times have I exaggerated the plight of others, or put them down? When have I actually ever been a friend?

Once, maybe once. Or twice. One time it was because I could never bring myself to hurt this person. She meant the world, literally, to me. Exposing her weaknesses was just out of the question. The second time was out of pity. This other friend needed me badly. We were united against a common enemy, shared the same anger and frustration. I listened to her grievings and acted accordingly. Those two people... barely acknowledge my existence anymore.

Jenny, my dear Jenny, is in a different city... country, almost. The other, my first Aussie friend and confidante, is learning to break away from me, learning to spread her wings. We rarely sit together at lunch, rarely have a proper conversation. I feel like I'm losing them... slowly but irrevocably. We're distant now... not as tightly-knit as before. I thought friendship was supposed to grow with time. Apparently not.

Pourquoi doit-il être si dur pour moi? Pourquoi est-ce que je ne peux pas juste avoir une vraie amitié pour une fois? Pourquoi est-ce que je dois être le spot sur le radar? Pourquoi je, de toutes les personnes? Pourquoi?

TELL ME.


10:31.
" Sunday, 13 May 2007

Oh my god, I'm like OBSESSING over every reasonably hot guy I come across, mannn. -.-" Last night was the Hale Bowling thing. I admit, I wasn't that keen, since almost all the girls that went were giving me 'rejected' vibes... But I dragged myself there in the hope that I would hopefully meet someone to divert me from the hopelessness of my life. So, we got there, and we were grouped with 3 other girls and 2 Hale boys. I had this short-ass dude called Preston, and his mate Josh. I swear Preston was hitting on me. I mean, he kept smiling at me, and everytime I looked his way he would already be looking at me. Hehe... Then we had this playfight, and he was acting all gay and doing his best Paris Hilton impersonation of "Oh... my GAWD". So convincing! But yeah. I was afraid that I had truly upset him, then at the end he was like "Oh, you weren't actually bulllying me, dadadadada" I was SO relieved, man! Then he went back to smiling at me, and when he got on the bus, I stopped at the window and looked at him, and he was smiling! So I smiled back :) Haha, happy. I don't actually like him, but yeah. Was FUN!!!

Toodle-pip!

lol, I'm finally happy XD


09:35.
" Saturday, 12 May 2007

I'm an idiot. Stupid, stupid, stupid idiot. WHY?! I mean, really, I am a SOOK. a WUSS. I am pissed off. Okay. Basically, the dinner was boring. Well, maybe because I was sitting next to guys that were just.... bleh. So, yeah. It was boring. Then I saw Pat. My heart like, stopped. Yeah, I know it sounds so cliche, but it did. I spent like, the first part of the dinner looking over the head of the guy next to me, gazing at Pat, hoping he'd notice me like, staring, and hopefully look back. I mean, he said "Hi" to me a few times last year @ socials, and last night it was like he didn't even recognise me. I was SOOO cut. After the food and the movie, I dragged Maddi beside me and like, walked in front of him 25 times. I even tried jabbering in Chinese to her next to him, in case he understood and turned around. But NO. Didn't work ..... -.-" Wah lau eh. Then, she was like "When he leaves, you can shout out 'Bye Patrick!'. So I was like, okay. Then when it was time, I didn't do it. DIAO. I felt like a complete utter ass that night.

Anyway, this morning Maddi gave me his number, on the condition that I text him. So I did. But he hasn't replied. Shit. OK, sorry for the retarded post peoples. Waaaaahh ..... *sob*

Toodle-pip


18:55.
" Monday, 7 May 2007

Hello!!!

Okay, ALMOST a week since my last post.... seems like forever, you know. *sigh*, time passes so quickly in the boarding house, man. I've got camp in 2 weeks. 2 miserable weeks, man. Aiyah... so stupid. I've already had a camp last term, okay? And now I have to go on another one. And this one is probably going to be shit. Like, REALLY shit. I'm so not prepared for this...

Okay. This is basically a post that's going to full of griping. Griping, not groping, mind you! I'll have a numbered list. K, 6SYians, this is probably not going to mean much again... Haizzz, whatever.

1. The Hale Bowling Social

Horrible, I tell you! See, I signed up this morning, since there were only 20 PLACES. And, (this is an important detail) the sign-up was only opened to us that exact morning. That exact morning. So, I rushed down, well, SPRINTED down to reception and put my name down with one of the Mistresses. Feeling ultra-happy coz I've never met any of the Hale guys EVER, I floated back up to my room... like, delirious. Then 5 bloody minutes later, my world comes positively crashing down on me. *crash*. Because they announce that they're scratching the list (starting it all over) and we'll have to re-sign up after school. I was like "Omigosh... WTF?!" I mean, they always tell us that it's first come first serve, and those girls that were late [a.k.a the rowers], well, too bad for them. I mean, me and a TON of girls that weren't put on the afternoon sign-up actually haven't been to ANY socials at ALL this term. AT ALL. How unfair is that????? Wah lau............. *sob*. That like, spoiled by day, you know?

Fine. Only one issue to gripe about, so whatever. So sorry that my posts are lame, luvies. Just that when I'm in a fit of anger, writing without damaging my computer in frustration is quite hard.

Toodle-pip!

P/S: Will tell you more about the formal dinner on Friday nite, k? K.


19:34.
" Thursday, 3 May 2007

Hello peoples!!!

Okay, I'm going to attempt to write a post that DOESN'T have any drabbling about Jonathan. AT ALL. ZERO. ZILCH. NADA. It's not going to be hard at all, I imagine. I mean, really.

Okay. Damn, I'm saying 'okay' too much... wah lau. The thing is, nothing interesting has happened at all for me to blog about leh... NOTHING. Okay. Next weekend, after the formal dinner with Scotch, I WILL POST. THEN IT WILL BE INTERESTING. UNTIL THEN, TA-TA!

Toodle-pip!!!


"LA FEMME .
hello, I am your worst nightmare

&maybe there's beauty in goodbye





Name: Eugenia
Birthday: 080294
School: PLC, Year 9


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